And then there was one.
Amidst the bloodied fields and crumpled bodies torn asunder, there stands but one remaining figure. He is bruised and battered himself, fatigued from the struggle, but nevertheless invigorated and gleaming. His chrome mask is dented but still shiny. At his feet his minion rats scurry by in the thousands, overtaking everything in sight, nothing bars their path now. His enemies have been vanquished. They were fearless and strong, but in this moment, remain only as memories. He stares at the soaring Cobra flag high above and revels in his power, soaking in the the mania of total control, the aura of total domination, and the euphoria of total victory .
He stands alone.
He is victorious.
He is Destro.
He is E-ron.
He is Crowned.
He is Champion.
Gentlemen, as Commish of Mick’s League O’ Micks, it is before you I present the Crown of Tin Foil, in all it’s glory, to the rightful champion, the winner of the 2008 season, and Tenth in a line of Champions.
The Rat Pack
WINNER: 2008 MLOM Crown of Tin Foil
For this honor you and your 2008 Rat Pack will be enshrined in the MLOM Hall of Champions, to be revered, envied, studied, copied, targeted, and remembered always. For this you alone have achieved, and none can ever take away.
And there it is team. Another season in the books. A hearty congrats to the best of the best – the 2008 Rat Pack. How Commish loves him some Mick’s League O’ Micks!
Let’s take a quick look at the Championship Game, for the archives.
The Rat Pack 97.71 over Los Pescaderos 58.47
Player of the Game: Jay Cutler 28.32 points
It’s crazy to think that Los Pescas put up 34 of their 58 points on the Thursday before the weekend had even arrived. It’s even crazier to think that those 34 points were put up by just two players, and that those players were none other than Dominic Rhodes and Tashard Choice. Not the line-up you envision taking you to a fantasy title, but of course with numbers like that neither one can be blamed. We cannot forget that both of Los Pesca’s holdovers, Barber and Gore, were injured for this game, a tough situation indeed. That said, the fill-ins remained the best part of the Los Pesca Crown effort. Where were the trouble spots? Well of course they started at the top with McNabb unable to lead his team to even a single touchdown agains the ho-hum Redskins. Turns out McFlabb had just enough in him to beat his former team, the Crackheeds, the week prior and then he mentally checked out just in time for the biggest game of the season. Sorry Gabe, you had turned the tide of public opinion on the Jacobs/McNabb trade a little bit, but now of course everyone is laughing uproariously again, even Commish from back here in some lesser place. You could have used Jacobs 3 TD rushes that day, but still it wouldn’t have been enough. All that said, Gabe had to gamble on a QB gambit of some sort. Perhaps he could have stuck with Shaun Hill, though Hill didn’t do all that much either, compiling 3 picks on the day.
The Pescaderos receiving corp certainly didn’t help, compiling only 7.67 points as a group. Houshmanzadeh’s goose egg stands by itself as a gleaming turd of what not to do in the big game. Even poor Megatron, awesome as he is, just didn’t have enough to give this day. And it just gets worse from there. The Giant defense, despite their top 10 fantasy season, didn’t have an answer for the Carolina Panthers or DeAngelo Williams or the Rat Pack. The irony of the fact that DeAngelo Williams, former Pescadero, himself ran wild for four touchdowns this day, hopefully was not lost on Gabe.
But though we poke fun Commish must offer credit where credit is due. Who else could have made the Title game with gimpy holdovers? Who else could compiled so many key victories in tough regular season games as well as in difficult playoff scenaris to have a chance? Not many, Commish contends. And though Gabe walks out of this game without a victory, Commish would advise him to study the 2001 and 2002 Over the Hill Gang teams and take some solace. Because after two straight years of losing Title Games, Papa Roston put things in overdrive, amassing an 11-2 record in 2003 and snagging a Crown himself in 2004. Gabe, in the words of Herman Edwards – you can build on this!
And on the other side there is the Rat Pack. What demons were exorcised as they finally stood up to and put the hurt on Los Pescaderos, a team that had bested them twice in humiliating fashion in arguably their biggest games of the regular season? For E-ron success this day started at the top, with 12th round pick Jay Cutler leading the Rat Pack charge. Despite his inconsistencies at times, he ended up bringing home the gold in this, the biggest game of the year. But why did the 2008 Rat Pack really win? It was the team concept, actually, and not some lone superstar steering this ship. The only true rock on this team was Larry Fitzgerald, who was on his way to a horrible day in the snows of New England when out of nowhere he busted off a 74 yard TD catch – thrown by Matt Leinart who probably held a beer bong in the other hand – in garbage time, a feat which took him to 101 yards on the day, and with the 100 yard bonus was a 14+ point play all by itself. After Fitzgerald, some players were up, some players were down, but it seemed to be different ones each week. Didn’t matter in the end, because the TEAM got the job done. The TEAM, and their resilient coach, overcoming such obstacles as recurrent vaginits in Steven Jackson (who knew there was enough clotrimazole cream in the world?), the WR roulette wheel, the ‘why score when I can go down at the 1-foot line and let my QB do it on the next play’ mentality of Marshawn Lynch, and the ridiculous overcoaching that had the Houston Defense actually appearing in a fantasy championship game. From the play of many comes of the concept of the Team, and none schooled it so well in 2008 as the Rat Pack.
And their it is. The season is over.
Commish will throw up a post in the next few weeks looking back on the league a little and doing some more analysis. Also I will update the website in time to reflect this year’s numbers and feats.
For now I offer this as we begin to close the door on 2008:
This league used to be a two-tiered league of the haves and the have-nots. Well as of last weekend, it has officially morphed into a three-tiered league of the have multiples, have ones, and the have none’s.
-The Rat Pack
-The Poo Fish
Where do you stand? Want to change it?
See you next season.